mancunian1998: (booth)
mancunian1998 ([personal profile] mancunian1998) wrote2016-02-18 11:33 am
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Это прелестно

Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation’s OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Fe0ffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.
Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.
Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.
Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
Pronunciation (think of Psyche!)
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won’t it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It’s a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.
Finally, which rhymes with enough,
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!!!

[identity profile] pssshik.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 11:52 am (UTC)(link)
Я сломался на середине сатанизма. Сколько нужно поколений британцев чтобы это прочитать быстро целиком и правильно?

[identity profile] pigdeon.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 12:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Ааа... отнимите же у них орфографический словарь!

[identity profile] pssshik.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 12:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Ну это как носители русского языка с трудом скажут конгруэнтность или орфоэпия. Про амбивалентность я молчу.

[identity profile] mancunian.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 01:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Трансцендентально!

[identity profile] pigdeon.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 02:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Это не просто "скороговорка", но еще и прочие интересные глюки, связанные с отсутствием (вот тоже слово: покруче, чем "здравствуйте" будет!) единой фонетической системы в английском языке. При этом у настоящих носителей этот факт никакого диссонанса не вызывает, т.к. они не связывают фонетику и морфологию, а запоминают "как есть", по-сути, в иероглифической форме.

[identity profile] mancunian.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 03:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Именно. Французский, к примеру, можно читать правильно даже если не понимаешь ни хрена.

[identity profile] pssshik.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 03:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Спасибо, кэп. Вот я то, когда детишкам обьясняю разницу между cheque и check не знаю об этом :)

[identity profile] mancunian.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 03:23 pm (UTC)(link)
В американском английском ее и нет - пишут check в обоих случаях.

[identity profile] pssshik.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 03:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Вспоминаю монтипайтонов и их шутку, про то, как пишется colour :)

[identity profile] pssshik.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 03:31 pm (UTC)(link)
В американском как раз и нет, они любители редукции, и все эти франкосонные буковки урезают на ходу.

[identity profile] mancunian.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 05:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Isn't it what I wrote?

[identity profile] pssshik.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 08:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Thn somth abo it

[identity profile] buddhistmind.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 05:31 pm (UTC)(link)
grammer not izy...

[identity profile] fiona-grady.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 07:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Ха ха ха! В детстве нас заставляли учить наизусть подобного рода стишки, а потом it became a second nature.

[identity profile] mancunian.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 07:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Good for you.

[identity profile] bors.livejournal.com 2016-02-18 10:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Мне больше вот этот фонетический алфавит нравится. Вот уж действительно памятник аутизму:
Image

[identity profile] xyrr.livejournal.com 2016-02-19 11:42 am (UTC)(link)
В английском нормально всё, к каждому слову прилагается транскрибирование в словаре. Это в французском запоминать надо правила чтения и никаких транскрипций нет.

Hiccough наверное уже никто не пишет вместо hiccup?